a budding photographer

lunch with friends

Lil loves to take my cellphone. She will snatch it up whenever I put it down, she will even unplug it from the charger without my knowing. She had a tendency to call the first person in my phone book until I added some security measures. Today I was using a photo app called Vignette to snap some cute pics of her bothering playing with the Cat when she sauntered over and stole the phone right from my hands. So I showed her how to use the camera feature (sort of), and after randomly hitting the screen a few dozen times, here's what she came up with:

Lil self-portrait #1

Lil self-portrait #2

"footsies"

This last picture isn't one she took herself exactly, but her hands were on the camera/phone.

love.

fresh

Lil to berries with fresh whipped cream: "NOM."

a mother's bias

My mother always told me I was the most beautiful girl she ever laid eyes on. I rolled my eyes, but the way she said it, I knew she believed it. She wasn't trying to convince me–she genuinely thought I was the most beautiful girl she ever saw. It never made sense to me, not because I constantly second-guessed and changed my appearance, but let's be honest- there were movie stars and supermodels and cheerleaders and beach volleyball players all over the world, and for years I had a perm. So I came to the conclusion that my mother was delusional.

I pride myself on not being delusional. I am a realist. A realist with a sense of humor and an imagination, but still, I think I see things for what they are. There's plenty I choose to ignore, but I tend not to wade in superficial waters. I don't even watch Bravo anymore (not because I have principles, I just get bored too easily with housewives and realtors).

My point. I have never placed a high value on appearance, so how can I ever say "my daughter is the most beautiful girl I've ever laid eyes on?"

Because, I took this picture the other day...

Um. Lil, you are the most beautiful girl I've ever laid eyes on...

daughter's day

my gift

I enjoyed celebrating mother's day as a child. Handmade cards, toast-and-oj-in-bed, fresh-picked wild flowers. My plan was always to be sweeter and more loving and more precious than my older brother. Sometimes it was a no-holds-barred competition, which wasn't fair because he was old enough to make pancakes and french toast and I could only use the toaster oven. No matter. As I recall, our mother enjoyed my gifts much more than his. 

It's different being a mother on mother's day. I'm not sure I do anything to deserve any extra devotion or added affection. Lil couldn't possibly go out of her way to be more loving, and she is not allowed near the toaster. At this age, she can only be her funny, beautiful little self. What more can I ask for?

Except.

I remember when I started earning enough to have extra spending money. I was so happy I could afford to send her flowers or buy her beautiful jewelry. She always said, "you really don't have to..." and I knew she meant it, but doting on her brought me joy. Since I couldn't be there, I wanted something lovely to be there in my place. 

I would've liked to be the daughter just one more time.

play day, play day

Lil to plush bowling pins: "you're all going down."

It's been rainy, rainy, rainy here is Brooklyn (not to mention the little issue with Mama's energy levels these days), so Lil has been getting a good deal of face time with the ol' toy bin. Originally it was storing Mama's spring/summer wardrobe, so it's a fairly good-sized bin. Lil is still too small to reach everything at the bottom of the bin and we ended up tipping it on its side, which made Lil Miss ever-so happy.

we capsized... stuffed animals overboard!

I am just happy she's good at the picking-up part of it as well. It even made the cacophony of battery-operated musical toys bearable. Her favorite activities are currently dancing, hiding toys in mama's sock drawer, and bowling. As if that's not enough fun, she's finally learning to clean. Is there a more perfect baby?

headshot thursday

smiles

video: lil piggy

Lil is learning animal sounds. When it comes to pig sounds, "oink" is a little complicated for a not-yet-16-month-old. She finds the whole thing really entertaining. She's amazed by snorts, but hasn't quite figured out a pig snort. It sounds more like she's clearing her throat, but it's cute nonetheless.

how ya gonna kick it?

This afternoon we learned that Adam Yauch died after a 3-year fight with cancer. Adam MCA Yauch, if you don't know, was one of the Beastie Boys, and spent most of his 47 years with the group. I was 8 years old when I first heard them, and I remember getting in trouble for screaming the words to "Brass Monkey" while on a class field trip. I remember thinking Ill Communication was one of the greatest hip-hop albums I ever heard, until Hello Nasty was released, and my then-boyfriend/ future husband purchased duplicate copies –on vinyl. We agreed their previous album was better, but that didn't stop us from playing it for 12 straight hours. (Also, the Hello Nasty album was yellow vinyl, in case you don't understand why I was so enamored.)

How to mourn the loss of one of the greatest influences of my childhood-adolescence-early adulthood? How to mourn such a big loss at such a young age to such a vile disease? I'm starting to realize that after the shock wears off, the first thing I feel isn't denial, depression, or anger. It's an overwhelming urge to celebrate life. So Lil and I booted up the computer, and found a trove of Beastie Boys vids on Youtube. 

Lil was captivated, full of exuberance, and hungry...

Life celebrated.

 

bear babe

Lil loves bath time, and she loves this dopey TV show on Nick Jr. Both of them she asks for by name, so how can I say no? On the rare occasion bath comes before her show comes on, Lil dons her fuzzy polar bear robe and plants herself in front of the tube. Much cuter than pj's. And way more sophisticated, yes? Someone get this girl a Perrier with a lemon wedge.

it's been a good day, the very best day...

no one looks this good in a bear bathrobe. no one.